Monday, December 5, 2011

Author Photos are Ruining My Books.

Okay, maybe I'm really shallow. It's definitely a possibility. But I'm seriously starting up a movement to have author photos removed from books.

Why, you ask? Well, let me start off by saying I'm not into steamy romance novels (we'll get to why that's relevant in just a second). I actually read urban fantasies.. and a couple mysteries. But it doesn't really seem to matter what genre of book you read - excepting young adult books, and then even some of those - because they all seem to have at least one racy scene in it.. if not a whole lot more.
And this is where my shallow personality comes into play. I care too much who's writing those scenes. When I was roughly 15, I was really getting into Sidney Sheldon books. I was under the impression, for whatever reason, that Sidney was a woman's name. Let me tell you, it's a real shock to the system to be reading a sex scene where the super hot woman is giving a dude a warm-water-in-her-mouth blow job, and find out that THIS guy had the dirty mind to write it:

Or that this woman has the thoughts of fox demon, dragon, and Svartan on witch foursome sex scenes.

Obviously, everyone has a dirty mind at some point, right? And I don't expect all authors to magically look like Scarlett Johansson or Ryan Reynolds. But it doesn't mean I like thinking about 80 year old men writing blow job sex scenes.

It's not just that, either. Authors (for me, at least) are kind of an imagination thing. Just like you picture a character in your head, and you get mad when the person on the cover art just doesn't measure up, the author is the same for me. I picture them looking a certain way, and the actual photo of them never measures up. It's like a kid meeting his favorite super hero - only to find out it's just some drunk in a suit.

So yeah, I'm a horrible, shallow person who only cares about appearances. You got me. Now who wants to join my movement?


  1. Okay so showing who wrote the Other World novels almost ruined them for me.

    1. I know, right? I think they should just stick with the bio and leave the image to the imagination.